Today we are asked to list both positive and negative aspects of the Mother Goddess archetype in ourselves. Let’s see how I roll:
Positive Mother Goddess Qualities:
Caring; generosity; genuine concern for loved ones; caring for those who are broken and/or in need; ferocity when defending those I love; an attitude of tough love when necessary; the wisdom born of youth experiences; a willingness to share this wisdom; doing things for those I love when they are unable to do for themselves.
Occasional jealousy of a loved one receiving their love and nurturing from others; a tendency toward possessiveness of those I love; a ferocity when defending loved ones that may go over the line sometimes, tough love that can be a bit too tough; resentment that builds sometimes when I feel someone is being too needy.
In my defense:
As I don’t exhibit all of those positive qualities all the time, so I don’t exhibit those negative qualities all the time. The positive qualities I attempt to cultivate, while the negative qualities I try to keep my good eye on and suppress when they come up.
That love that can be too tough and resentment over those who come across as too needy is probably the thing on which I need to work the most. Boundaries are important, but sometimes I want to cut someone off way before they reach the boundary. I have a very, very low tolerance for whining. It’s strange because I don’t get this at all from my mother or other matronly figures in my life. I think it is born instead by having lived with a physical disability and, on top of that, having suffered much trauma. There is an ugly part of me that snarls, “If I have lived through all I have lived through, how dare you whine about your sore throat/earache/bad day, etc.” There is a part of me that values suffering in silence, which is more a reflection on how I treat myself than on how I treat others.
We always are so much kinder to others than we are to ourselves.
There’s my epiphany for today. The positive Mother Goddess qualities I express to others whereas, in most cases, I reserve the Dark Mother Goddess qualities for myself.
Something to work on for sure.